Explaining a Loved One’s Diagnosis
A cancer diagnosis in the family is overwhelming, and explaining it to children requires sensitivity, honesty, and age-appropriate communication. Addressing cancer honestly can help children deal better in the Indian environment, where family ties are strong yet conversations about disease may be avoided. Here are a few tips to help you handle this challenging discussion.
Emotional Reactions at Different Ages
- Young Children (2–6 years): May regress in behaviors like bedwetting, become clinging, or fear separation. They require confirmation that they are protected and cherished.
- School-Aged (6–12 years): Frequently feel guilty or worry about creating the disease. They might retreat or act out. Regular stability and unambiguous explanations are beneficial.
- Teens (13 and up): They may respond with detachment, anxiety, or rage. They require openness regarding the diagnosis and room to deal with their feelings while continuing to participate in family decision-making.
Practical Language for Different Ages
- For Young Kids: Use simple terms like, “Grandma is sick with something called cancer. Doctors are giving her special medicine to help”
- For Tweens: Explain cancer as “bad cells” and treat side effects (e.g., hair loss, fatigue) in advance to reduce shock.
- For teenagers: Talk about the diagnosis, treatment options, and possible results in a straightforward manner. Encourage inquiry and collaborative research.
Involving Children in Caregiving
Simple actions like making get-well cards or lending a hand with little chores (like carrying water) can help young children feel included. After being emotionally prepared, tweens and adolescents can be included in hospital visits or light caregiving duties. Just make sure they don’t feel overburdened; strike a balance between their involvement and their mental health.
Tips from Psychologists & Survivor Families
- Be Honest but Hopeful: Avoid false promises but emphasise treatment efforts.
- Maintain Routines: Stability in school and activities provides comfort.
- Use Indian Support Systems: Leverage joint family support for emotional scaffolding.
Helpful Resources
- Books: The Hare Who Lost Her Hair (Indian adaptation for kids).
- Digital Tools: Apps like Paalan 1000 (for caregiver stress) 3 and Navya (cancer care info).
- Counseling: Consult NGOs such as the Cancer Patients Aid Association (CPAA) for assistance.